3 Ways to Deal with Parental Burnout for a Healthier Family Life

Do you find yourself constantly responding with "I'm fine," even when you're not? Raising kids is not easy, but most parents feel like they have to power through it, even when they're feeling overwhelmed by the mental, emotional, and physical strain of parenthood.

However, it's important to realize that covering up the underlying sources of prolonged stress and exhaustion can actually make you an ineffective parent. Parents should take time to identify the causes of burnout and find realistic, guilt-free ways to prioritize self care!

What Exactly Is Parental Burnout?

Parental burnout is a state of emotional, mental, and physical exhaustion that affects most parents at certain times, causing feelings of overwhelm and ineffective parenting. According to the World Health Organization, burnout is a syndrome characterized by emotional exhaustion, depersonalization, and a decrease in self-fulfillment, that comes from chronic exposure to emotionally draining environments - like parenthood.

Parental burnout should not be ignored. It can lead to serious health issues, such as depression, anxiety, and disrupted sleep patterns, affecting not only the parent but also the entire family life. Facing constant stress creates a vicious cycle of wanting to power through challenges, not facing things in a healthy way, and then feeling burnt out by every little detail of life.

Recognizing the symptoms of parental burnout, such as emotional exhaustion and emotional distancing, is crucial to knowing when to seek professional help and managing its effects on your day to day life.

Understanding The Risk Factors Of Parental Burnout

What puts some parents more at risk for facing burnout? Certain risk factors, such as chronic stress, lack of child care support, and unrealistic expectations for your children, can contribute to parental burnout.

Some families also face unique struggles that make them more sensitive to stressors. Single parents, parents of special needs children, and those with a history of mental health issues are more prone to experiencing burnout.

Understanding these risk factors can help parents take proactive steps to prevent burnout and maintain their mental health and well-being. Seeking support from other parents, family members, or a mental health professional can also help lessen the effects of burnout and make you a better parent.

3 Ways to Prevent Burnout as a Busy Parent

Many parents can sense when they're feeling too overwhelmed, but they don't know how to combat always feeling exhausted and overwhelmed. Here are some simple ways parents can overcome the challenges of raising kids.

1. Prioritizing Mental Health

Prioritizing mental health is essential to managing parental burnout, as it can help parents develop the coping strategies they need to improve their overall well-being.

From a clinical standpoint, the science suggests that self-care, self-compassion, and emotional regulation are critical parts of maintaining good mental health. Parents can prioritize their mental health by engaging in activities that promote relaxation and stress reduction, such as regular exercise, meditation, or spending time in outside nature. Just going on an evening walk, taking a family bike ride on the weekends, practicing sports with your kids, or taking a yoga class at the local community center can make a big difference in your self worth and self esteem.

By prioritizing their mental health, you can become better equipped to manage the countless demands of parenting and maintain a healthier family life.

Practicing Self Care

Practicing self-care is essential to managing parental burnout, as it can help parents recharge and reduce feelings of exhaustion. Self-care activities might include taking a relaxing bath, reading a book, or enjoying a hobby like sewing, gardening, or watching movies. These activities can help parents reduce stress and increase their energy levels.

Parents can also prioritize self-care by setting realistic expectations for themselves, asking for help when needed, and taking breaks from everyday tasks. Nobody should feel the pressure to do it all. Learn to rely more on your spouse or another family member during times of immense stress and overwhelm.

By practicing self-care, parents can improve their overall mental well-being and become more effective and compassionate parents.

2. Cultivating Self Compassion

Cultivating self-compassion is also important for managing parental burnout, as it can help parents develop a more positive and supportive relationship with themselves. What is self-compassion?

Self-compassion involves treating oneself with kindness, understanding, and patience, rather than judgment or criticism. Raising children is not easy, and parents should know that feelings of guilt and shame have no place in parenthood! There is no need to compare yourself to others. You are only responsible for raising your own children, in the way that best works for your family. A quick pathway to burnout is to play the comparison game!

Parents can cultivate a sense of self-compassion by practicing mindfulness, reframing negative self-talk, and acknowledging their common humanity with other parents. By cultivating this self-compassion, parents can reduce their feelings of guilt, shame, and inadequacy, and develop a more positive and resilient mindset.

Having self compassion is a good way to fight off depression and anxiety. If you're struggling, try to analyze the way you view yourself and speak more kindly of yourself. Raising kids can bring on a whirlwind of emotions, but it's important not to let the negative feelings affect the way you view yourself. Focus on the fact that you are doing your best, and there is no such thing as a perfect parent.

3. Developing Parenting Skills

Developing parenting skills is essential to preventing parental burnout, as it can help parents feel more confident and competent in their role in raising kids. Parents can develop these skills by seeking parenting advice, attending local workshops or classes, finding support groups, and practicing positive parenting techniques.

Effective parenting skills include things like active listening, having empathy, and problem-solving. These skills can help parents build stronger relationships with their children and reduce conflict within the family.

By developing your parenting skills, you can improve your overall well-being and create a more positive and supportive family environment within your home. Joining parenting support groups, both in person or online (check out our KeaCommunity group on Facebook!), is not only a great place to make friends, but also gives you a safe space to talk about your feelings and struggles with raising children.

Avoiding the "Perfect Parent" Trap

The "perfect parent" trap can contribute to parental burnout, as it creates unrealistic expectations and promotes self-criticism. There is no such thing as a perfect parent. We are all imperfect humans trying our best in raising the next generation. This takes a lot of patience, energy, and resilience!

Parents can avoid the perfect parent trap by acknowledging that they are human, making mistakes is inevitable, and that it’s okay to ask for help. By letting go of the crazy goal to be perfect, parents can reduce stress levels, increase self-compassion, and develop a more realistic and positive approach to parenting.

Parents can also prioritize their own needs and well-being, recognizing that taking care of themselves is essential to being a good parent. Not taking enough time for yourself can affect you in the long run. Don't forget that you're a person too, with your own needs and goals, outside of being a parent.

Understanding and Managing Emotional Distance

Emotional distancing can also be a symptom of parental burnout, causing parents to feel detached from their children and struggling to connect with them. Parents can manage these feelings by prioritizing spending enough quality time with their children, engaging in activities that promote family bonding, and practicing empathy and understanding.

By managing feelings of emotional distance, parents can strengthen their relationships with their kids, reduce conflict, and create a more positive and supportive family environment. Seeking professional help from a mental health professional like a therapist can also provide parents with additional support and guidance in managing emotional distance. Don't let burnout increase feelings of detachment with your own children - make sure to take care of yourself, physically and mentally, so you can be a present parent.

Five Simple Steps for a More Fulfilling Life

1. Stop talking bad about yourself.

2. Prioritize rest.

3. Do something creative.

4. Forgive your past mistakes.

5. Be patient with yourself and your kids.

You are allowed to feel emotions. You are allowed to relax, sleep, and rest (beyond just taking a nap one day). You are allowed to pursue those hobbies that make you feel alive. You are allowed to see your mistakes and learn from them, not obsess over them. You are allowed to be confident in yourself and your parenting abilities. Don't let burnout convince you that you're a bad parent!

Burnout can quickly destroy the relationship with one's children.

Don't let burnout destroy your relationship with your children. Burnout can look like sleep problems, depression, unexplained exhaustion, and lack of motivation. It might make you feel disconnected from your children. Burnout can happen to anyone, so if you're feeling overloaded by the pressures of parenthood, don't be afraid to reach out for help. All parents deserve a break!